2007.10.11

The prototype of today's youth.

America has gone soft. Very few parents and children display any level of personal responsibility or accountability. The 'entitlement' generation has almost completely taken over.

This year, I accepted the opportunity to coach junior high football. I have been completely and totally amazed the lack of mental and physical toughness displayed by the young athletes. I have even more shocked and amazed by the parents enabling this frightening behavior in these boys.

These kids spend WAY too much time playing x-box and drinking Coke. There were plenty of kids on the team, but there were very few athletes. My 8-year-old son runs a faster 40-time than all but a couple of the 12 and 13-year-old players. That is not a good sign. These kids are slow.

Ok, so the kids are slow and pudgy around the middle. We definitely weren't going to out run anyone. So, our next best option was to run over opponents. Sadly, these pudgy kids are also weak. These kids are affectionately known as "plus sizes".

Apparently, tapping the square button on the playstation controller does not build as much strength as we had hoped. So, now we know the kids are sundial slow, soft as four-ply Charmin, and as strong as a 4-week-old wounded sparrow.

To compensate, maybe the kids have a lot of pent up aggression. Maybe the kids get angry and go nuts. Maybe if I take the juice box away, one of the kids will show signs of life.

... Nope ...

These kids barely register a pulse. I called the county coroner on two separate occasions. I was afraid we had lost a kid. After careful examination, the coroner concluded that the kid was alive but extremely lazy.

Our practices are CHALLENGING. Mini-Mattis visited practice this past week. After practice, I asked what he thought. Mini-Mattis said, "Practice looked hard... hard... hard."

We spend a significant portion of each practice working on the fundamentals of blocking and tackling. A lot of that time is spent in one-on-one competitions. There is a clear winner and a clear loser. The winner goes to the end of the line. The loser has to do "up downs".

There is a small group of kids that hide at the back of the line - hoping that they can go unnoticed. They don't want to block. They don't want to tackle. They definitely do not want to do "up downs". Then, after one trip through the line, the kid will complain that he is in someway injured and needs to stay out of the drills.

Of course, this is all under the assumption that the kid actually comes to practice. As I learned this season, practices are apparently optional. Little Johnny missed practice because:
1) I was sick (went to school all day)
2) open gym for basketball
3) select team baseball practice
4) boy scouts
5) Church group
6) homework
7) my grandma wouldn't let me
8) I got something in my eye at recess

This just a short list of some of the excuses kids used this year. There was one kid who legitimately missed half of the practices this season. This kid wondered - asked me repeatedly - why he wasn't on starting offense or starting defense.

So, to bring you up to speed once more... We now know the kids are sundial slow, soft as four-ply Charmin, as strong as a 4-week-old blind and wounded sparrow, as portly as Eric Cartman during the 'beefcake' era, and about as aggressive as a gold fish in a petting zoo.

I am not even going to get started on the conversations I have fielded from concerned parents. Ugh.