2007.08.29

A man who just died is delivered to a Kentucky mortuary wearing an expensive, expertly tailored black suit. Bubba the mortician asks the deceased's wife how she would like the body dressed. He points out that the man does look very good in the black suit he is already wearing.

The widow however, says that she always thought her husband looked his best in blue, and that she wants him in a blue suit. She gives Bubba a blank check and says, "I don't care what it costs, but please have my husband in a blue suit for the viewing."

The woman returns the next day for the viewing To her delight she finds her husband dressed in a gorgeous blue suit with a subtle chalk stripe;. The suit fits him perfectly. She says to Bubba, "Whatever the cost, I'm very satisfied. You did an excellent job and I'm very grateful. How much did you spend?"

To her astonishment, Bubba presents her with the blank check. "Dere's no charge," he says.

"No, really, I must pay you for the cost of that exquisite blue suit!" she says.

"Honestly, ma'am," Bubba says, "it didn't cost me a ting. You see, a deceased gentleman of about your husband's size was brought in shortly after you left yesterday, and he was wearing an attractive blue suit.

I asked his missus if she minded him going to his grave wearing a black suit instead, and she said it made no difference as long as he looked nice."

"So, I just switched the heads."

On Saturday, Mini-Mattis competed in a Dayton, Ohio based NFL Punt, Pass, and Kick competition. Mini-Mattis finished second in the 8 and 9 year old bracket. He will move on to sectionals in Cincinnati this October. I am very proud of him.

On Sunday, the Wee Rams had their first official game of the regular season. Offensively, Mini-Mattis lined up at wing (running back) and quarterback. Defensively, he was a cornerback.

The video (right) shows three of his highlight plays from the day. In the first play, cornerback Mini-Mattis blows up the Vikings wide receiver for a 7-yard loss.

In the second play, Mini-Mattis takes the hand off and scampers 14 yards for a touchdown.

In the third play, Mini-Mattis de-cleats two defenders allowing the quarterback a clear path to score. One of the defenders had to be helped off of the field. While I would NEVER encourage Mini-Mattis to injure an opponent, I am very happy to see the force behind his block.

That is all!