Mark Mattis / Merth

One of the most valuable lessons I have learned in life is, "If you do not believe in yourself - no one else will."

Things go wrong - problems arise - it happens. Do you have the self-confidence to keep going when others have failed? Beyond that, many of the challenges we face in life are mental mountains and not physical ones.

I have a small gym facility. The gym is sometimes referred to as the OTC - the Omega Training Compound. I workout with intensity. I push those that lift with me to share in that intensity. We push beyond 'comfortable' limits. We challenge ourselves.

I am trying to develop some of those OTC traits in my son. There are couple of words that I use with him on a regular basis - RELENTLESS and BELIEVE. You have to believe in yourself in your goals and in your dreams. Then, you have to be relentless in your pursuit of those goals. You have to fight through adversity. You have to overcome obstacles.

On Sunday, we (the family) journeyed to the local mall. Cie (7-years-old) wanted a new toy. I made him an offer, "Climb the wall at Dick's Sporting Goods and reach the very top and you can get the toy."

Cie began to protest, "I can only make it half way. I CAN'T go all of the way to the top. I CAN'T do it. I can only go halfway." (Cie is afraid of heights.)

We went back and forth for a few minutes. Eventually, he said he could do it. Cie and my wife strapped in and began to climb. My wife scurried up the wall. Cie was cruising along... and then... halfway... he just stopped. He started repeating over and over, "I CAN'T do it!"

He let go of the wall and grabbed on to the rope. My wife pleaded with him. The employee holding his safety rope pleaded with him. He mentally shutdown. He was slowly lowered the ground.

He walked over to me - crying because he failed. We calmly talked about it. I kept telling him, "You CAN do this. But, YOU have to believe you CAN do this."

Do you believe?

Physically, he is 100% completely capable of flying up the wall. I have no doubts. Mentally, he is frightened by the height. He is frightened by the challenge.

I was not going to force him to climb the wall. I told him we could go home. But, he still really wanted the new toy. So, now... more determined... he said he wanted another shot at the wall. I offered to climb beside him.

We started up the wall. We got the halfway point roughly 15 feet off of the ground. He once again froze. Tears were streaming down his face. He started saying, "I CAN'T do it. I CAN'T do it."

I stayed calm. I continued to reassure him. I continued to walk him through what needed to happen. Everything I said was relaxed and positive.

After a nearly 5-minute standstill, Cie made his mind up that he COULD do it. By this point, a crowd had gathered. There were probably 30 bystanders gathered around the fenced area. A few people were yelling out words of encouragement.

He stepped where he needed to step. His hand reached up to the next ledge. One after another he kept moving. He climbed all of the way to the top. He honked the horn at the top. He was then lowered safely to the ground as the bystanders applauded and congratulated him.

I am enormously proud of my son. Physically, he is more than capable of scaling the wall. Mentally, he had to overcome fear, doubt, and frustration - he had to BELIEVE in himself. He did it. It takes a lot of HEART to keep climbing when you just don't think there is anything left in the tank.

Confidence is often the difference between success and failure.